Big Fish

I've mentioned before how I used to be like a little fish in my pre-teens, how my ol'dear used to take my brother and I for swimming lessons and how I'd quickly covered my dodgy trunks in ribbons and badges which hailed my progress...but oh how times have changed, and while my bro still remarks on how good I am at mimicking sea life in water, I sadly now admit that I now more closely resemble hippos than salmon.

I'm a proud man, but not a stupid one, so when it came to facing a 1500 metre open water swim for The Triathlon Challenge, I enlisted the help of two dear friends to teach me all they know about freestyle and that stroke that all young lads giggle when saying the name out loud...

Coach Passingham, as I've already posted, began taking lessons just to get involved in The Triathlon Challenge and has kindly started showing me what he's learnt during the hours he's had so far through private tuition. My other coach is sized and shaped almost exactly like one of my original swimming teachers from back in the day - only Mrs Nicky Mansell doesn't stroll along the poolside barking orders at me like a sergeant major with chipped shoulder.

After work yesterday I met the beautifully pint-sized Coach Nicky and the rest of Family Mansell at the kind of establishment I'd originally set out to avoid, a David Lloyd health and fitness club. I've got to say I was pleasantly surprised, while yes there were many an orange lady dressed as if going out for a night on the town, and yes there were also men who looked more preened than a royal cat, there were actually some genuine, exercise enthusiasts in the mix too.

Coach Nicky & The Everyman Olympian dodge the orange folk at David Lloyd Basildon for a pic by the outdoor pool

Coach Nicky's husband (and close personal friend of mine) Darren took energetic son James off to play tennis on one of the carpeted courts while my teacher and I were escorted by her daughter Felicity (or Flick as she's affectionately known) to the pool.

Unfortunately there were two down sides to the timing of our visit: firstly the outdoor pool was out of bounds due to a heating system failure and secondly, the men's showers were off limits due to refurbishment, all-in-all this actually made the place seem more regular and for my mind it even seemed more endearing for it's faults subdued the otherwise over-shiny gloss.

In the pool, Coach Nicky wasted no time in assessing the state of my front crawl and immediately set about giving me tasks to focus on the different elements I was struggling with, we worked on my breaststroke in tandem, a method which allowed me to have a breather while keeping me active.

For well over an hour I was analysed, set back to work and re-analysed, until eventually I'd near mastered the breast and had improved my freestyle to the point of exhaustion. I thoroughly enjoyed the lesson, Nicky's extensive teaching skills (she's an excellent teacher on the governments payroll when away from the pool) were just the tonic, and I even managed to beat a 9 year old in a race too! Though I'm sure Flick was going easy.

1000 metres later I was given the homework of restarting yoga to help with my breathing and Coach Nicky once more remarked that I must 'become as long as I can in the water'.

Afterwards on her Facebook page, Coach placed this update: 'teaching Boris to channel his inner Michael Phelps. Such fun!'

I can't wait for my next swimming lesson, I want to become a big fish!

PS I'd also like to give a mention to excellent local swimwear specialist retailer The Goggle Box, who earlier in the day provided excellent service when selling me some new Speedo goggles and swim shorts, cheers!

The Triathlon Challenge - Swimming Lesson 1: Sink or Swim

I've mentioned before that as I child I was part fish, right? Well, take it from me, when I hit the pool up to around the age of 13 I could coast through the water like a pal of Nemo's and no mistake.

Like most kids in the UK however, when I hit my teens I became of obsessed with trying to appear older and swapped pools for fields with shelters where we could drink cheap booze which we'd waited hours to pluck up the courage to attempt to buy...how very mature we were!

In my ambitions thus far to ready myself for The Triathlon Challenge I'd focused mainly on gaining time back in the saddle, and more recently I'd bolted running onto the end of this cycling session at a ratio a quarter run per cycle; the equivalent to the Olympic Triathlon quota. I'd shied away from tackling my now weak Freestyle stroke by opting for the 'easy' legs of the Tri task.

Knowing that I'd lost all confidence in my front crawl, I sought help from my mate Mr Glen Passingham, a chap whom I may have mentioned before looks like telly's Louis Spence, the gay world's latest champion.



The real Louis Spence

We arrived at the rather inappropriately named LA Fitness in Thorpe Bay before noon and on entering the pool Glen fetched 2 floats and 2 long foam tubes called Noodles which we tied knots into, these items would act as buoyancy aids for the lesson. Well they would have until a rather selfish member of the staff come and reclaimed her precious floats because they were hers and she didn't want us to use them; clearly we had the look of float thieves and two chaps who'd come to the pool to swim, despite our best efforts (I have to mention that the rest of the staff were as friendly as you could hope for, compete with smiles and all).

Floatless, my instructor began the lesson with a four-stroke warm-up; I opted for two breast, one poor crawl and one backstroke, on the latter I crashed into my pal.

Glen had recently started swimming lesson himself on the back of accepting my request for some company for The Triathlon Challenge, and generously offered to pass on his new found knowledge to me as I'd struggled to arrange lessons myself. He set exercises where I use a noodle in front of me while I focused on kicking, breathing and using alternate arms.

Fitness-wise I felt fine, though I kept taking in too much water and because of poor timing I'd regularly have to force myself up for air mid-stroke, though by the end of the lesson I felt I had a better grasp of the basics of Freestyle and for the final quarter I was free to put all of my fresh learning's into practise while Coach Passingham clocked up some lengths in the lane beside me.

After the swim we chatted in the sauna for a while before chilling pool side after cooling off, and then used the shower facilities back in the changing rooms, it was only when emerging from separate cubicles to the sound of The Communards 'Don't Leave Me This Way' over the club's internal sound system that I realised what a very Louis Spence afternoon we'd had.

Coach Passingham outside LA Fitness...in Thorpe Bay (Please note: this is NOT Louis Spence).

My advice kids is stay in the pool, age will come to you soon enough.

Keep paddling,

The Everyman Olympian

The Swimming Challenge: Big Fish

Swimming is the oldest sport in the world...OK, so maybe when it first came around it was used as a mode of transport and most likely didn't involve the four techniques we know of today, but in theory we swam before we could walk (give or take a few hundred thousand years for developing from the sea, via apes to our current shape of the moment).

Let me take you back to the Eighties:

Proper cold Winter nights from mid October onwards, the smell of chlorine coming from a plastic carrier bag on a lino-covered floor in the 'utility' room, the odour of vinegar and the sea lingering over the dinner table and happy happy faces under semi-wet hair...ah the joy of a fish'n'chip supper with the family after my mother had taken my older brother and I out for swimming lessons.

Dinner of champions.

I'm sure it was the same in many households across Britain in the 80's, kids as a populace the nation over progressed in their learning outside of the odd swimming lesson at school during weekday evenings at their local pool.

I had the worst trunks in the world but boy I loved 'em and my word how I enjoyed watching my mum stitching a fresh ribbon or badge onto them after another milestone triumph at Pitsea Swimming Pool.

Three decades later I stroll into the pool room at my local baths, I may only be 7 miles from where I learnt this most affordable of sports, but oh my am I light years away from the standards I managed back in the day.

Conscious of my belly folding like a decorative napkin in a posh restaurant, I quickly drop into the pool when I think most eyes are busy looking elsewhere. Now, how do you do this again?

Some twenty or so years since I last swam regularly, here is the challenge I was faced with:

The Swimming Challenge

• Distance: 10,000 metres
• Time: 12 days

Lungs are undervalued my friends, undervalued I tells ya! Mine were almost bursting after that first two lengths, I had to lean with my back to the shallow end wall of the pool and get myself back to below panic levels of breathing - how the heck did the old folk next to me manage to keep going?!

If you can swim to any level them I implore you to go to your local pool and give this a go; it's surely the most recession-proof of sports: trunks, admission, a towel from home and a coin for the locker that you get back = less than twenty quid to get started, and thereafter just your admission fee is needed.

What I really love about this sport is that it's almost totally indiscriminate; you can drop into the pool between a beef of a bodybuilder and a plump dinner lady and you won't know which is the best swimmer until they get started.
With children's sessions and general swimming scheduled in my local pools during the weekends I would need to hit an average of 40 lengths of a 25 metre pool, every week day for a fortnight in order to achieve my target, I just didn't know if I'd be able to make the minimum target let alone the fact that now I would have to exceed it to get the job done.

But swimming is a sport where you can quickly improve: when I got started on my challenge I had to stop for a breather after every two lengths, unable to reach my goal of forty lengths per session (I dragged my sorry arse out of the pool at 28 on that first session), but persistence would pay off.

Unable to manage the freestyle stroke (front crawl to some), I battled the waters with a patchwork breast stroke technique, made up from past memories and watching other pool users. This itself would put additional pressure on my hip and shoulder joints which would simply have to stay strong and see me through.

I'd frequent Belfairs Swimming Pool in that first week, sometimes before and sometimes after work and by the end of the week I was pretty shattered...and my right shoulder popped if I rotated it. I'd managed 188 lengths, and still had a 12 length deficit from the first session to make up.

A weekend break gave me the chance to rest up and try to get tips from friends and acquaintances on Twitter.

Back in the pool on Monday I managed my now standard forty lengths, by this time I was capable of six lengths without stopping, then another six, and then it would vary until I crawled 'over the line'.

That second week I clawed back the deficit with an almighty 50 lengths in my homecoming visit to Pitsea Pool, the place where I took my very first lessons under the guidance of their excellent staff.

By the end of the week I felt like I was half made of chlorine, the webbed feet hadn't quite appeared yet but I reckon my eyes were becoming immune to the sting of the chemically cleaned waters.

This last forty lengths would be my toughest challenge; with an evening of travelling ahead and a relatively short window in which to make my bid for glory I entered the water at Aylestone Leisure Centre, it was a Friday and I'd be pitting my whits against Joe Public during a general 'swim' period - most visitors in these times do anything but proper swimming.

I dodged mothers on social gatherings, teenage girls intent on catching up on gossip while pretending to do lengths, and younger kids dive-bombing when the lifeguards weren't watching. Each length came with added distance through sideways manoeuvres made so I didn't get poked in the eye by a brightly-coloured nail varnished toe or kicked in the head by kids trying to impress their pals.

My last few lengths were like a scene from Saving Private Ryan, suddenly the group of kids hanging out by the deep end split in two and seemed to go on a never ending dive-bombing frenzy; each time I headed into the thick soup I'd get clattered by a cluster of tiny feet and sharp elbows.

Exhausted yet triumphant I touched the tiles for the final time only to realise I'd lost my swim shorts. Just kidding - this only happened in the dream I had that night!

Winter Warmers

With the weather here in the UK looking to show early intent that we're in for a harsh and drawn-out Winter I'm looking to move my focus to indoor sports, so what sporting options do I have available for The Everyman Olympics?

Swimming I've just bagged (report to follow soonish...I know I owe you a few) so what else do I have left to tackle in The Great Indoors?

Fencing - a sport I've been keen to start for a while; its got swords and cool outfits, plus the added benefit of decent war wounds - what more could a lad ask for? Having just noticed I'm being followed by @britishfencing on Twitter I've sent them a message, fingers crossed they'll come back with a way for me to get started!

Wrestling - I've a tenuous link to this one: a pal of mine works with someone connected to the GB team for Greco Roman Wrestling - if you read this Chris, lets talk more on this when I visit Friday.

Basketball - 'Pat Ball' as my ol' Grandad used to say (bless him). Apparently a girl very close to me knows someone who may know someone who can help, but you know how those kind of contacts tend to go...

Football - OK so really this is an outdoor sport but I'm up for a game of indoor footie soon if YOU are? (Hoping to bag this one in December)

Water Polo  - @GB_WaterPolo have got back to me on Twitter and I may be able to hook up with the actual GB teams in late January (thanks to both Ollie from the BBC, @BBCSport_Ollie.and Una - @aqua2swim - for the contact via Twitter)

Diving & Synchronized Swimming - here's hoping Una and Lauren can help me here too x*

*Over-friendly kiss - hoping it helps!

Handball - I've no links whatsoever for this one...HELP!!!!

Boxing - Rocky famously trained outside on some occasions but the beatings usually take place in a warm and 'cosy' ring (Pete Puma - insert gag 'here')

Track Cycling - I'm in need of getting to Manchester Velodrome, or waiting till the actual Olympics one is finished in nearby London - then hoping the very helpful Karim of @catchsport can convince Lord Coe to let me use it (I see the great man follows you on Twitter)

Taekwondo - If you're out there and can help with this one, please get in touch!

Gymnastics - Artistic, Rhythmic or Trampolining - I'm even up for these if you can point me in the right direction y'all?

Volleyball - Isn't this just Netball for boys? (Just kidding ; )

So if you can help me with these Winter Warmers please GET IN TOUCH... email me at theeverymanolympian@googlemail.com or send me a tweet on Twitter

I look forward to hearing from you soon x*

The Everyman Olympics: Re-Galvanised

How 12 Events became EVERY Sport in the Olympics...

As the buzz of The Canoeing Challenge settled I started to envision putting together an event around my next task, so as to get more people involved all together in one glorious day...though this wasn't the only thing taking up my spare time: word of my tasks had started to get me noticed and this attention lead me to re-think the core idea at the very heart of my challenges - this is the story of how The Everyman Olympics became Re-Galvanised.

As you may know, this is how I first layed down the rules to myself:

• One challenge to be set every month for a year, based on a different Olympic sport

Because I work in a job where I travel around 35,000 miles per year by car, and have various trips abroad and would be organising the whole thing myself I thought that this would in itself be plenty to keep me busy.

You might also recall that my reasons for doing this series of tasks were purely targetted at weightloss - more specifically I wanted to lose a stone of the fat stuff.

Oh and there was the slight matter of beating my pal Carl in the race to lose this stone....some of us will already know how that story ended.

Back to the point in hand...

A few days after hooking up with Graham, who I'd met on The Cycling Challenge I received a phone call from Mike Miners, a journalist for the local paper - The Evening Echo.

Mike had heard of my sporting challenges through a mutual friend of his and Grahams and wanted to write a report on me.

I was already in training for my next event at the time and so after a telephone interview we agreed to meet at Southend Leisure & Tennis Centre for some photos to be taken of me in action.



The Everyman Olympian (Me)


A few days later I was staring at myself on Page 5, here's a link to Mike's great article:

http://www.echo-news.co.uk/news/8382831.Olympic_Games__I___m_in_training_for_every_event/

Literally the day after this came out I was contacted on Twitter by the very delightful Shana Pearlman, a producer for BBC Essex Radio no less!

Shana invited me onto the Dave Monk Show to be interviewed live on air - naturally I lept at the chance (being an 'Olympian' and all).

(Unfortunately for some stupid reason Blogger won't allow me to upload the recording I have of this interview - if anyone out there has any tips on how to get this on, please let me know)

Before I did this chat on the radio I looked back at the interview for The Evening Echo and realised that Mike Miner's had printed a quote from me which I hadn't really taken in:

“Originally it was a 12 month project, but now I hope to try every sport before the 2012 games in London.”

EVERY SPORT??!!!....I. Must. Be. Bonkers!

Realising that I'd clearly got excited in the moment, I took the bull by the horns, marched into BBC Essex Radio HQ and ran with it.

So there you have it, the London Olympics in 2012 will feature 26 Sports (though some are broken down into more events) - I've now completed 8 of them and have 20 months left to do the rest.

Here's a list of the sports I've yet to tackle:

Archery
Basketball
Beach Volleyball / Volleyball
Boxing
Diving / Swimming / Synchronised Swimming / Water Polo.
Equestrian - Dressage / Eventing / Jumping
Fencing
Football
Gymnastics - Artistic / Rhythmic / Trampoline
Handball
Hockey
Judo
Modern Pentathlon
Sailing
Shooting
Taekwondo
Triathlon
Wrestling.

If I'm going to achieve this I Need Your Help - leave your details in the comment box below or email me at theeverymanolympian@googlemail.com to find out how YOU can help me and get involved in The Everyman Olympics.

Thanks in advance,

The Everyman Olympian

The Hybrid Games #1

The Modern Olympics were founded by eccentric and interestingly-named Greek philanthropist Evangelis Vasileiou Zappas back in the mid 19th Century, as well as relighting the Olympic torch he also added in his own version of the Pentathlon: the Modern Pentathlon; an event which sandwiches together 5 events with seemingly as much connection as a mobile phone in the Sahara Desert - this got me thinking, what other sports could be combined to make fresh Olympic events?

Garcling

OK so Gardening isn't strictly a sport but let me tell you I've been laying paving in my garden these last few weekends and there's no shortage of lifts, stretches and reps involved - I woke with badly aching limbs last Sunday morning before going off with the lads on a 34 mile bike ride and while trying to keep up I got to thinking - this combination could be a winner...

Garcling = Gardening & Cycling

How would it work?

One idea would be to do a 5km BMX sprint, followed by digging a trench, then a 10km off road mountain bike trek, followed by chopping down a tree, and finishing in a 40km road bike race, split by a hedge sculpture challenge...now think it sounds easy?



I'm willing to offer my garden for use in London 2012 - save me the job


Sweights

Weightlifters work hard for the right to go to the Olympics and show everyone how strong they are, but once they're there they get off lightly and don't even have to place the weights on the bars themselves - but what if these lazy muscly dudes (and dudettes) did have to load the weights on themselves, and what if instead of the weights being handilly on a nearby rack, they were laying on the bottom of a pool?

Sweights = Swimming & Weights

How would it work?

Racing against the clock, the musclemen and women would have to dive for the weights, load a barbell to the required amount and then complete the legal lift before the bell rings.

Warning: You may look like a tit during training

Cliving

No this is not some random new sport where contenders round up as many people called Clive by any means possible within a set time limit (sadly), but instead works along a similar principle to Sweights...

Cliving = Climbing & Diving

How would it work?

Athletes have to climb up a cliff side, then dive off of the top in as stylish a manner as possible - how sexy a combo is this?!!

'Oh bugger I've left me climbing boots up theeeeeerrrrrrrreeeeeee'